Jim worked in a carrot canning factory for over 30 years. One day he came home to his wife to tell her that he has terrible urges to stick his d#ck into the carrot slicer. His wife is shocked and suggests that he should see a therapist to talk about it, but Jim said he would be too embarrassed. He said it was probably just a phase and he would be ok.
One day a few weeks later, Jim came home. His wife could see that something was seriously wrong. "What's wrong, Jim?" she asked.
"Do you remember that I told you how I had this incredible urge to put my d#ck into the carrot slicer?"
"Jim, please tell me you didn't!"
"Yes, I did."
"My God Jim, what happened?"
"I got fired."
"Oh no! I mean why? What happened to the carrot slicer?"
"She got fired too."